You Learned to be Afraid

What’s the worst bar bet ever? Betting your buddies they can’t name the three most common fears. The answer is:

Arachnophobia- fear of spiders

Ophidiophobia- fear of snakes

Acrophobia- fear of heights

But here’s a bar bet you can win, name the only two fears people are born with? The answer is falling and loud noises.

This means nobody is born afraid of spiders, snakes, or heights. You’re acting out a learned behavior when you white knuckle the arm rest on an airplane.

Fear is a touchy subject with men. Most men don’t want to talk the topic, and most men dang sure don’t like to admit they have fears. But men do have fears. Their fears aren’t so much about spiders or snakes, instead here’s what men are afraid of.

Top 10 Fears of Men

  1. Someone will leave me
  2. Someone is criticizing me
  3. I am disappointing someone
  4. Failure
  5. Someone won’t like what I have to say
  6. Someone will reveal I’m an imposter
  7. The haters are right
  8. Going broke
  9. Asking for help
  10. Losing respect

The tragic part is these fears having being holding back generations of men from being the best version of themselves for no good reason. Remember, other than falling or loud noises, any fear you have was learned. You didn’t come into the world with the fear someone would reveal you’re an imposter (even though you’re not). You learned to be afraid of going broke.

These fears have feed wrong thinking. And wrong thinking has sent you and me to the bench instead of getting in the game. All because we were afraid of something we didn’t have to be. We don’t have to be afraid to ask for help or disappointing someone. We don’t HAVE to be afraid of anything.

Life is too short to live in fear. Don’t let fear hold you back and prevent you from being the best version of yourself.

The Guy’s Guide to a Good Life tip is to look at every fear as defeatable. Don’t allow yourself to fall into fear trap. Stand up to fear.

Try this, the next time you’re afraid to ask for help, ask anyway. You’ll discover they’ll respect you more not less. And you will have taken a giant step to overcoming fear.